Posted by sophia - - 0 comments

Prelude

So after the amount of anger that I had stored up inside in reference to the previous post in regards to my expirience and some people that I know, I have decided to go on a fast with frind of mine.

We took an entire semester to study the book of Hosea, which explains the cons of "idol worshiping" as well as what means. We realized as the main idol in our life is: dating.

I love being in relationships, I love the feeling of having someone there. However, I don't like that I am still so broken from the past, I dont like seeing my friends broken about their present dating situations, and I really dont like having to worry about the future of my love life.

I made a choice to anymore a long time ago. There is only one person I know that can fill that spot in my heart, and I want to keep it as clean and pure as I can.


Me and my friend created some fasting braclets that we will wear for an entire month. This will be our daily reminder that we need to keep focused on God. Everytime we deviate our focus awayfrom God to thinking about bad relationships, we read a Bible verse, write it down along with some of our thoughts and say a prayer. Eventually the number should dwindle to zero by the end of this fasting.


So please readers, if you could provide your prayers during this time it would be much apprieciated.



Day 1

Its now 7:39PM. I have had 7 "moments". My biggest source is that my friends are all going through some relationship problems, which makes me reflect on my past, and I want to get past that. Those things were responsibile for 5 of the "moments". The other two,were some long stemmed drama notes of my own.

But during my prayer time, God said it was time to remove this stone. He reminded me that I was looking for a stong man to depend on in my life, and I have been so selfish to forget. My father. My father really is the best man in my world. I want to have a man in my life that reminds me of my father,and I know that there is one who can.

He his smart,poised, confident, respectful... a true gentleman. He treats my mother as a queen, he is always there for his family, sacrifices for us, makes sure he knows we are loved.


My father notices when there is something wrong with his daugthers, and has noticed something was going on without me saying a word. He provided the intervention I needed, bringing clarity to the situation.


I could type on forever about all of this, but in the end.... I have seen some guys come into my life and seen some guys come into my friends life. THey are all not perfect. But there is always a perfect match. No one, man or woman should settle for less. You know you are in love when you can accepta person for all they are and are not, however, there is no reason that you should try and mold them into what you think is "ideal".

I have the habit of trying to set aside what is reality to try and frame what is my fantasy in my head, to make this person the "perfect match" when they are in actuality , very far from it. There is no legit reason for me to want to persue a relationship with a person like that. period.

but as for the "perfect match".... :)

Thanks for reading